Stop Building Your Network - Start Building Your Community

Every textbook, handbook, TedTalk, and offered advice about building your professional career says you need to have a big professional network. The bigger your web, the more flies you will catch…or so we were told.

I think we’re looking at it the wrong way.

To be clear, being connected to like-minded people who you can spend time with for mutual benefit is hugely important. I don’t question that. 

But when I think of “network” and “networking” in the professional context, I often think of loose strands, superficial conversations, and a bit of a guessing game about the value proposition. I also think that the space of networking often values volume over value…the size of one’s network is the equity, vs the quality of the connections and bonds within that network. I’ve never felt a sense of belonging or trust in a room of 500 people eating rubber chicken at a “networking lunch.” 

The reframe I use is to stop using the word “network” and start using the word “community.” More than just a word-swap, it’s a new and more generative way at looking at the same important topic. It prioritizes value over volume, it’s about concentration vs dilution, and it connects more to what truly matters.

Within the learnings of Designing Your Life, the concept of Formative Communities is becoming a bigger and bigger part of the conversation in our community of Certified Coaches. The authors and creators Bill Burnett and Dave Evans have so much goodness to share about this, and we live into this concept of Formative Communities through our Designing Your Life work together. 

And Formative Communities are not free-for-alls. They have a purpose and shape, made up of the following components: 

Container - who is part of this community and why?

Construct - how will this community connect with one another?

Conversation - what do we talk and share about?

Community - what emotion or feeling are we creating?

So why do communities matter so much in our careers?

• Communities are the gathering place where we can make meaning of our work and lives. They help us make sense of the things going around us (especially when we are overwhelmed and struggling) and are a home base that we can use to feel grounded. They are safe (but not always comfortable) spaces for discovery and reflection. As Dave says, “they allow us to hear the harmonics in our work and lives.”

• Communities are generative and self-sustaining. They grow from the collective effort and commitment of all their members. They share their knowledge and power generously with everyone involved and forge on due to the will and commitment of its members. The magic multiplier is the collective wisdom and earned experience of others coming together in one place.

• Communities are committed to getting better together. There’s a fiduciary commitment to each other’s progress. The collective tide must and will rise to the betterment of everyone involved. They bake in a circle of accountability that propels people to things they might not be able to achieve on their own.

I don’t think that most networks in the professional context hit those high notes.

In my new-ish career as a solopreneur, communities matter deeply to me…more so than any other time in my long career. Even though I connect with people every day through my coaching and facilitation, working on your own can be tough. The apathy of isolation and self-doubt can jump in anytime. The antidote is the communities I have around me. Some of those are client groups where I have professional and personal connections that have been around a really long time. Some of those are other coaching professions who, by their very nature, love to share and grow together. Some of those are a diverse collection of people who connect around a learning or way of thinking (like Designing Your Life) where we have substantive and generative conversations that make a world of difference to me.

I also think that the pandemic shone a light on the concept of “networking” and pivoted us properly towards the concept of community. Because we all needed a deeper and more personal/vulnerable connection during that wild time than what traditional networking provided.

I love this amazing quote from James Clear: “Surround yourself with people who have the habits you want to have yourself. You’ll rise together.” 

So let’s rise together. Let’s channel our energy from broad and sometimes aimless networks that don’t create value, and get focused on building and nurturing communities that make us all better. Be a catalyst for creating a community with like-minded people where you can all grow together.